2021 . . . 10 years in the game. What have I learned? Only the moment counts.
Updated: Oct 25, 2021
Good afternoon to all my readers. . .
So here I am again, Finally back on the road, touring again. To be honest I'm not a big traveler, I remember back when I was first starting out, I saw no point in touring. I thought; " What's the point of me touring?" There are plenty of guys traveling to my city and plenty of wealthy men whom live here. Why do I need to venture out of my comfort zone to accommodate guys? But of course I get it now. Of course I am also grateful as hell now for the opportunity to be able to travel for work as an independent contractor, this is cool as hell, no lie. The fact that I can go places, pretty much anywhere ; Except probably the middle of no where lol, but then again I notice some girls even some girls whom have been close friends of mine whom capitalize off of these places because no one thinks to go there, I mean after all there are men of means in all areas, although not as concentrated nor as willing to believe that a woman's time is worth the rate they are charging as big city man would.
So here I am 10 years into this profession, still very grateful and appreciative of the opportunities I get to engage in, the men that I get to see, the things that I get to learn from those whom are more than willing to show and tell me their successes. I still would not choose any other profession, and as I have boasted on boards and in my tagline on twitter, i am proud to say that no one except myself has made on red dime off of my ass but me. This is a lonely profession and sometimes I wonder how much more fulfilled I would be if i went into an office everyday and got to interact with people everyday... or a restaurant, or whatever other type of industry where you see the same people everyday and make friends. I know a lot of people say they don't make friends a work and hate going there.... but you never miss what you have until it is gone. I don't know what to say about all of that, just like I would miss being able to be on my own terms everyday if I had to be on someone else's.
I'm an only child so its not like I can meet people through family, and I am a true only child, no cousins and what not i hang out with. I have a very small family. It gets lonely and I don't mind being alone because that is familiar to me. . . and I know people who have brothers and sisters are lonely too. At the same time the fact that I have to go outside to have social interaction makes a me bit hyper when I do see new people. Its like an over stimulus and I am super happy to engage with society. But not on social media, I like to go outside, being from the Midwest, we always love being outside especially during warm weather months and even in the cold too.
I am very social and I thrive on meeting new people. I have been single for 7 years... and I have only had 3 boyfriends my whole life, 2 of them are dead. SO i am getting used to being alone all the time. Sometimes I think I should embrace it because I know so many people and from past experiences, how I longed to be able to do what I wanted to do whenever I wanted to do it. But I also have those memories of being with someone and not being alone and always feeling loved and adored... do I need those things? I used to think of course I needed those things more than anything in the world. However now as times goes by and i get older I am starting to think those connections I placed so much value on mean nothing. Only the moment counts.